Extract from marsvenus.com -
2. Breaking into his cave

This is a big �no-no� for Venusians. When a Martian has a problem, he goes to his cave (becomes quiet and withdrawn) to solve it. This is normal behavior, and during these times, he doesn�t want to talk or be disturbed. If you follow him into his cave, or pressure him to talk, you�re likely to encounter a fire-breathing dragon. When a Martian is forced out of their cave before they are ready it�s a bit like waking a sleeping giant. If you give your Martian the space to work their issues out on their own you are showing them that you trust them. And trusting a Martian to do their best is one of the greatest gifts a Venusian can give their partner. So enjoy the time, see a movie, go out with friends, or simply relax� He�ll be back soon enough.
=================================================================

Is this what I should be doing> just allowing a man to ponder in his hole? Gosh... why are men and women made so differently!? this is killing me! Yeeeeeks!